Why I Began Special Effects Makeup

Hello frenz! Welcome back! You might notice that things look a little different here on my blog, as well on my other social media accounts. I’ve recently started doing special effects makeup, and it turns out that I’m rather decent at it. I enjoy doing it so much that I’ve shied away from my blog for a little while. When I started blogging, I thought that I wanted to be this magnificent writer, but some thoughts have changed. Don’t get me wrong, I still LOVE to write…but I also LOVE doing makeup. But I’ve been thinking, why choose between two passions when I can do them both? So here it is, my new and improved blog…all about SFX makeup. For my readers who prefer my serious, article-type posts, I will still post those as a way to get my thoughts out, but the bulk of my content will be about SFX makeup. I’ve been told to create a YouTube channel for my looks, but I’m not too good with cameras, editing and talking. I’m better with written words and I only think it’s fair to give you all the best of my content.

First off, I want to say that I am in NO WAY a professional makeup artist. I do makeup for fun and all of the opinions expressed here on out are based off of my own experiences. If you’re looking for professional makeup advice, you’ve come to the wrong place, my dear. With that being said, I’ve been doing makeup since I was very young. It started with toy makeup as a baby nugget and progressed to spending all of my hard earned money at Sephora. I’ve been practicing my skills for some time now, and I’ve just now gotten to the point where I can say, with confidence, that I am good at makeup. Practice most certainly makes perfect, and with practice comes understanding. When you’ve played and practiced with makeup for so long, you begin to understand its use. It’s like an art — you begin to understand highlights and shadows and what colors flatter certain skin tones and eye colors. That’s when it starts to get fun.

I’ve always had a love for horror and gore. The first horror movie I ever watched was The Nightmare on Elm Street when I was really young. I was hooked after that. I enjoy the rush of being scared. I enjoy watching a bloody masterpiece in someone’s mind come to life. Call me weird, call me crazy, but it’s something I’ve always been fascinated with. I’ve always had an appreciation for art, too, but the problem with that is I’m not very artistic. I can’t draw for shit but I can color the shit out of a coloring book. Years ago, my sister introduced me to Glam and Gore on YouTube. I had found a new appreciation for special effects art. I would watch in awe as she created stunningly bloody looks, knowing that I would never be able to create it due to the lack of artistry in my veins. I became a bystander to the very thing I loved.

Thinking I could never do it made me never want to try. I thought I needed all of these products and a boatload of cash to be able to create these looks. But there was one day where I just said, fuck it, I’m gonna try. I broke out the eye shadow palettes and went to town. I was surprised with how natural it came to me. I’ve never been good at art, so how was I good at this? I found my new hobby and passion that day. Now fast forward three weeks — I’m shocked by my progression. Three weeks of practice has me creating looks that I never dreamed of being able to create. Not only have I impressed myself, but the public support has been overwhelming. I can’t figure out why I waited this long to do what I love, but I’m happy I started when I did.

I hope you enjoyed my little background story. If you’re interested in doing SFX, dramatic/glam, or even everyday makeup looks, my advice is to just do it. Try it and see what you’re able to create. Your undiscovered skills might shock you.

spooky

Liebster Award Nomination 2017 & My Nominees

Hello frenz and welcome back! This post is extra special and near & dear to my heart. I was nominated by the lovely RenaΒ for the Liebster Award! For those of you who aren’t familiar with what that is, it’s an award for bloggers. No trophy involved, just recognition and support for your blog. It’s a big deal for me, because I’ve literally never been nominated for anything. I once won a 3rd place Track and Field award in elementary school, but that’s about the extent of my award winning abilities. If you haven’t, go check out Rena’s blog. She’s a cat loving personal blogger who writes about some pretty relatable stuff – plus she’s super sweet, so give her blog a read. Now, without further adieu, let’s get into this thing!Β 

Rena’s questions to me are as follows, with my answers. I hope you enjoy getting to know a little more about me!

1. What is your go-to dressed up outfit? Every time you want to look done up, what do you tend to do?
Well, let’s address the outfit portion — I usually where anything that I feel comfortable and confident in. It really depends on my mood. Sometimes I want to wear a dress, and other times leggings and a cute top can suffice as “dressed up”. Don’t judge — comfortable can also be dressy. As for what I do to look done up, I definitely gotta fill in these sparse brows and add a sharp as shit winged liner.

2. What is the last book you read?
I’m one of those people that read half a book and then put it down and start another one. I’m currently in the middle of reading three different books, but the actual last one would be Salem Falls by Jodi Picoult. This book caught my eye on Walmart’s book shelf AGES ago, mainly because it had Salem in the name. I hardly remember what it’s about but I know I really enjoyed it. Perhaps I’ll make it the fourth book in my ongoing reading frenzy.

3. Why did you choose the blog platform you are on?
Mainly because I wanted a site where I was able to gain followers straight from the platform. Plus, I’ve heard very good things about WordPress. I honestly don’t think I’ll ever transfer platforms. WordPress is where it’s at for me.

4. What is one goal you have accomplished this year that you are really proud of?
Finding what I want to do in life. It’s not so much of a goal I had, but I’m really happy that I found my calling this year. I know I want to write for a living, and in learning that, it’s completely changed my outlook on the future.

5. What hair product would you rather not live without?
Leave-in conditioner. My hair has a nice, natural texture to it. I can live without styling it, but I definitely need it to be hydrated so it doesn’t turn into broom bristles.

6. What methods do you use to plan your blog posts?
I take mental notes most of the time. I get an idea and outline it in my head. If it’s a more complicated post that requires research and planning, I free write on my phone just to get my ideas out. Then I paste it as a draft in WordPress, get on my laptop and paste it into a Word document for edit. 90% of the time, I plan and upload posts from my iPhone.

7. What is one beauty trend you’re afraid to try but really want to?
Bright colored hair. I once dyed my platinum blonde hair a non-permanent blue and it stained my hair. I spent countless nights bleaching my hair to get it out, leaving it dry and lifeless. I love the look of ombre’d colored hair and I would kill to have it, but I’m way too apprehensive due to a bad experience.

8. Do you prefer sweet or salty snacks?
It ultimately depends on my mood. Sometimes I have a hankering for chocolate that can only be satisfied by eating four bags of M&Ms. And then other times, I can eat 12 bags of potato chips like it’s nothing. I honestly don’t snack too often, but the type of snack I want is usually reliant on my mood.

9. What is one song you can’t stop listening to at the moment?
I don’t have one specific song as I do one specific artist. I went full 2006 emo kid and listened to My Chemical Romance for a month. Now I’m on a Melanie Martinez kick. I give it a few days until I’m jamming to Cannibal Corpse for weeks.

10. Do you have a favorite magazine and why?
I might be in my 20s, but I’m still a huge fan of Seventeen magazine. They have a lot of nice tips and trends — plus they always have vibrant colors which usually catch my eye. Their articles/stories are also very well written and their magazine is nicely put together.

11. What is one piece of advice you would give a first-time blogger?
Just do it. You might feel silly or like a noob, but the blogging community is extremely supportive of all types of blogs. I thought since I didn’t write about makeup or beauty that there wasn’t going to be a place for me in the blogging world, but the reactions to my posts are just the opposite. I have tons of blogger friends. I honestly have more online friends than I do in real life. Blogging is a commitment, but if you’re truly passionate about it, you will love every second of it. Just put yourself out there and go for it.

Now that you learned a little about me, it’s time for my nominations! Since Rena nominated me, I’ve been constantly thinking of who I want to nominate. There’s this rule about only nominating blogs with “200 followers or less”, but I feel weird about asking someone or creeping on their blog. So I’m going to nominate some of my favorite bloggers that really need some love and recognition.

Mystic Mogwai – I found this girl on Twitter and she’s so incredible. I love her style and her blog name is ingenious. She’s not one specific type of blogger, which is why I love her blog so much. She’s chatty and her blogs are fun to read!

Natural Hazards and MoreΒ – This girl deserves so much recognition for her ongoing battle of informing the internet world on science. Her blogs are extremely important to the future of the planet.

Ditzy D Blog Β – She writes about her self journey through anxiety and depression in such a beautifully honest way. Her blog deserves so much recognition.

The Emma LifestyleΒ – She’s a lifestyle blogger who writes about everything — from beauty products to book reviews to everyday life. She’s a sweetheart and I really enjoy her blog.

Howling LibrariesΒ – I really love book bloggers. Although I’m not currently too much of a reader, I enjoy reading book reviews. She writes really solid reviews, so why not go give her blog a read?

Black Tulip BeautyΒ – And last, but certainly not least, is one of my FAVORITE beauty bloggers out there — mainly because she’s a total babe and I wish I could jack her style. She writes incredible product reviews and also has sunflower yellow hair!? She’s the total package when it comes to beauty bloggers.

Below are the questions for my nominees, if you choose to accept! Have fun!

1. If you could be any animal, which would you be? Why?

2. What is your holy grail beauty product and why?

3. What is the one thing you want most out of life?

4. How do you come up with ideas for blog posts?

5. Who is your biggest role model? Why?

6. If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?

7. What is your dream job?

8. Do you think you would survive in a zombie apocalypse? Why or why not?

9. What are you most confident about?

10. What’s your favorite movie and why?

Goals for the Rest of 2017

Hello frenz! Welcome back to whatever this blog has come to. I've been bored with my blog lately, so I thought about doing something a little different. I've seen these done before and I think it's fabulous to share goals with likeminded individuals. I've tried to keep this post upbeat, but to be honest, I haven't been so positive lately. So here goes – my goal list for the rest of 2017.

GET A JOB
I've been unemployed since March, so that makes a total of almost five months now. I was planning to join the Air Force, but realized that I was leaving too much behind (also I'm too old to be tricked by military schemes). I put that goal behind me and now I have another – to find a job. Not only do I need one to pay my bills and buy food, but I'm tired of not working. Every day since losing my job has turned into a blur and I'm ready to be productive again.

SAVE MONEY
I really don't want to live in Pennsylvania anymore. It's poor and highly taxed. The weather sucks and my town should be known as Drug and Crime Central. By getting a decent (and steady) paycheck from accomplishing Goal #1, I hope to be able to start saving enough money to get the hell out of here within the next two years.

GAIN A FOLLOWING
I want to write for a living, I've known that for some time now. I want to be a full time writer or even a full time blogger at some point. I want to get my blog out there and create a name for myself. I need to start creating my empire.

LIVE STRESS FREE
I don't think I've ever had this amount of stress in my life. I have nervous breakdowns almost every day, mostly due to lack of money. I can't afford things I want and need. I want to live stress free again. I want to be able to enjoy life and wake up happy.

BEGIN SFX MAKEUP
This is something I've wanted to do for some time, but haven't had the money or want to invest the time in. But Halloween is coming up and you best believe I want to scare all the kiddos on the block this year.

MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LIFE
Since money has been so tight recently, I've only been eating once a day and skipping the gym to conserve gas. I need to get back into the routine of working out regularly and eating enough so I don't waste away into nothing. It's easier said than done when you have $-33 to your name.

TAKE ANOTHER TRIP TO FL
My trip to Florida at the beginning of July was so incredible. Seeing and spending time with my family meant so much to me. I want to make it into a regular visit.

READ MORE
I really do enjoy reading, but I lack the interest to do anything other than nap (thanks depression). I also find myself reading the words but daydreaming about something else, which leads me to reading the same paragraph ten times. I have so many books but have only read maybe five of them. I'd like to read them all and then add to my collection.

BUY MORE MAKEUP PRODUCTS
It sounds a little materialistic but I'm a sucker when it comes to makeup. I watch and read tons of reviews on new products and I want them all…but lack the dough to get them. I haven't purchased any new makeup in at least a year, and it's breaking my heart.

GIVE GIFTS AT CHRISTMAS
Last Christmas was horrible. I wasn't able to get anything for anyone and it made me feel so low. Christmas is my second favorite holiday and I love giving to others. I want to be able to give to everyone I can this year, and even to the less fortunate. I miss having the means to be generous.

BE GENUINELY HAPPY
I haven't been happy in such a long time, and I really miss the feeling of enjoying life. I need to get that feeling back for my own sanity.

I'm keeping this list as my own little time capsule of things I want to accomplish. I hope to look back in January 2018 to have accomplished all of these and then some. Here's to my future endeavors.

23 Things I’ve Learned in 23 Years

I’ve been on this planet for 23 years now. That’s 8,359 days and 201,480 hours. Within that time, I’ve learned some things about myself and my life, as most do when they grow older. Some things take a longer time to learn because you need to experience self growth, while others are learned in an instant. Below are 23 things I’ve learned in 23 years — things I wish I could tell younger me.

1. Perseverence is Key
Hard work really does pay off. Don’t give up.

2. Do What You Love
Even if it’s a hobby like painting yard gnomes, do it any chance you get. You deserve to have a joyous passion.

3. Blood Doesn’t Mean Family
It’s all about how you’re treated. My boyfriend’s family is more of mine than my own…because they treat me like family. See how that works? Don’t feel obligated to stick by someone just because of blood relation. You don’t need that negativity and stress in your life.

4. Nothing Lasts Forever
Whatever you’re going through, it won’t last forever. Keep pushing through the hard times and keep having good times. It all gets better.

5. Friends Come & Friends Go
Your best friend when your 15 might not be your best friend later in life. You might keep in touch and catch up once in a blue moon, but it might not ever be like it was. And that’s okay.

6. Less is More
I’ve been living on my own for three years, I’ve just now begun to realize how much stuff I actually own…and it’s driving me to insanity. Don’t clutter your space because you really want a turtle statue that you have no place for.

7. Prepare, Prepare, Prepare
Mentally prepare for events or things that make you anxious or scared. It makes the experience less traumatic.

8. Read
Read the newspaper. Read about current events. Read everything you can. Knowledge is power.

9. Drink in Moderation
Drinking way over your limit, being sick that night and/or the next morning, along with a headache and a craving for McDonald’s? No, thanks.

10. Wear Whatever You Want
Honestly, life is too short to care what someone else thinks.

11. Stop Comparing Yourself
You’re YOU for a reason — you don’t need to be like anyone else. Become comfortable with yourself. Self love shines through.

12. Exercise More
Relieve your stress and lose some weight in the process.

13. Challenge Yourself
Set goals for yourself and force yourself to get there. Future you will thank you. 

14. Follow Your Dreams
We all take a different path sometimes because we’re not 100% sure of what we want. But when you come to that great realization, chase that dream. You can do anything you set your mind to.

15. Stop Feeling Bad for Being Lost
So you don’t know where to go or what to do in life? Stop feeling bad for it. There are people who seemingly have it all that are just as lost as you are. 

16. Have a Backbone
Stand up for what you believe in. Don’t take shit from anyone.

18. Stop Eating Fast Food
Cooking is fun and you can choose what goes into your food. Fast food makes you feel like garbage. You don’t deserve to feel like garbage.

19. Be Yourself
Stay true to who you are. Don’t lose yourself in the mindless trends or the competitive nature of life.

20. Learn About Your Planet
Grow familiar with where you live and the nature surrounding you. Mother Earth is a beautiful planet. Take care of it.

21. Plan and Prioritize
Plan out everything and learn to prioritize your life. Routines and plans can save you from chaos.

22. Love
Fall in love. No matter what you think, you will be accepted by another human. Stop being scared of that.

23. Build Your Empire
No matter what you have set for your life, work and build it. Be a boss. 

Is Social Media a Popularity Contest?

CONTEST.png

Ah, social media, the time waster and meme maker. The internet and social media are incredible technologies. We can create content, whether it be a video, writing, artwork, whatever you’re into — we create it and we’re able to share it with anyone in any part of the world at any time. There are thousands, if not millions, of creators trying hard to be noticed on social media, through the vast sea of like-minded internet peers. We want our content to be seen and heard by everyone. It’s almost like high school, trying to be noticed by the cute senior with the car. It’s a popularity contest based solely off of follows and likes from total strangers.

Between Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat and other social media platforms, there are millions of people trying to get noticed; either by a company, record label or just likes on a picture. When did numbers begin to validate our existences? I remember a time when I would delete pictures off of Instagram or Facebook if they didn’t get “enough” likes. I was so wrapped up in the validation of perfect strangers that I lost track of who I was in real life. I was trying to portray a version of myself on the internet; a person that someone would like — and for what? Follows and likes. Since coming out of the “it’s all about numbers” phase, I’ve been able to be one of the more honest folks on the internet. I stopped caring about the numbers because it doesn’t define me or my content. If they like me, they’ll follow me. If not, oh well.

Recently, I’ve become increasingly aware of creators who have, let’s say, 14k Twitter followers, but complain that they only have 40 blog or video views. It’s not about having a great number of followers; it’s about having an audience, people who like what you create and genuinely want to read/listen. I can’t figure out why so many creators take so much time to gain unengaging and, ultimately, fake followers, when they could be producing a potential groundbreaking masterpiece. Not everyone is going to like what you produce, just like you may not like what someone else produces. We all have our likes and dislikes, and you can’t be upset when someone doesn’t necessarily like what you create. For example, I’m not going to follow a blog that has a niche in childcare when I don’t have kids. My follow won’t matter if I’m not reading and engaging with the creator.

We need to stop getting caught up in false validation and get back to creating unique and incredible content. As a creator, I enjoy writing. It gives me a creative way to get my thoughts out of my head and onto a virtual notepad. I started a blog because I wanted to share my thoughts and my seemingly different opinions. I wanted to have a voice in this world and maybe even make a difference. I want readers to relate to my thoughts, and maybe take something away from my experiences to better themselves. I put hard work into my posts. I do the research when necessary. I revise the same sentence and paragraph a million times before I’m satisfied with the way it sounds. I get joy out of creating my little space on the internet.

“I like to do it. If someone doesn’t like it, they don’t have to read it.”

Social media can be a gift to creators who really want to make something out of their passions. It’s no longer a popularity contest when you care less about the numbers and more about the real-life person behind that follow or like button.

To all of my readers and followers, thank you for reading. You all mean the world to me and you make my little space on the internet radiate with light. I wish you all the very best.

rl

[Photo Credit: Pixabay]

Letting Go of Toxic Thoughts

toxic thoughts

We all have toxic or negative thoughts, whether it’s about ourselves, other people or something we don’t fancy doing. Sometimes these thoughts can overpower all of the positive ones, and as a result we’re left feeling mentally and emotionally drained. But how do we stop seeing the negative and start noticing the positive side to life? That’s where mind control comes in. No, not the type that David Blaine does on Las Vegas sidewalks; I’m talking about controlling our own minds to turn toxic thoughts into positive thoughts.

Sometimes I get overwhelming thoughts about myself. My mind makes me feel that I’m not good at anything and sometimes, it even goes as far as making me feel that the world would be better off without me. I’m a generally optimistic person, I just have a few issues with anxiety…so why do I feel this way? Negative or toxic thinking usually begins with a mistake I’ve made that I feel overly embarrassed for, and then it turns into thinking about everything I’ve ever done wrong. If you think like this too, there is a way to control it. You simply talk yourself out of it. It sounds crazy, I know, but it’s really that simple. Let yourself make a mistake. Acknowledge said mistake, learn how to do better next time, and move on. Don’t beat yourself up for it. You’re human. This is how you grow and become better. This is especially true if you’re a toxic thinker in relationships. Talk to your significant other about it. Sometimes their reassurance is all you need to convince yourself that it’s okay to be human. This goes hand in hand with perfectionism, which is a main player in my toxic thoughts.

“I want so bad to be perfect although I know perfect does not exist.”

Turning toxic thoughts into positive thoughts can be grueling when you’re not naturally an optimistic person, but sometimes that’s all it takes to turn your day around. It’s an old saying, but try to look on the bright side. Yeah, things might be hard at work or you’re having a crap day, but there’s always a positive. Spilled your coffee in your car? There’s a reason to buy that Starbucks coffee that you never get to have, and a reason to stop the procrastination of cleaning your car. Is your boss on your case really hard today? Remember that all days come to an end. It’s so easy to jump to toxic thinking when something bad happens. It’s easy to think that one disaster can ruin your whole day; but it can get better when you deal with a problem when it happens, and then move on. Deal with your emotions in the moment rather than letting them boil all day until the inevitable eruption.

Stop taking everything so personally. This is something I’ve struggled with and I am just now learning how to handle. I’m a people pleaser, especially when it comes to a loved one. If my boyfriend wakes up grumpy, I automatically assume it’s because of me. When he loses his temper at a video game, I get nervous because I don’t want him upset or mad at me. I’m familiar with the fact that it has nothing to do with me, but my toxic thoughts lead me to think that I did something wrong. If you’re like this too, stop it. Stop it right now. Not everything is a personal attack at you. Learn to understand the difference between a person who is grumpy at the world and a person who is grumpy at you. Walk away or ignore this behavior in your loved one to save yourself time and energy.

Sometimes we do have bad days where everything is happening all at once and we can’t help but become overwhelmed and frustrated. I’m not denying that days like this exist. I’m also not denying that anxiety and toxic thinking feed off of each other. What I do know is that you can talk yourself out of any emotion as long as you acknowledge it, deal with it and move forward. Your mind likes to play a lot of tricks on you. Start playing tricks back.

Until next time, XO.

[Photo Credit: Pixabay]

What You Don’t Hear About Living in Poverty

poverty

Poverty is around us everyday, whether we choose to acknowledge it or keep it in the back of our minds like that bad 90s techno song. Poverty doesn’t discriminate. It doesn’t care about your race, gender, who your parents are or that you graduated college with a perfect GPA. With the price of living rising and decent paying jobs becoming few and far between, it’s hard to keep your head above water in the modern day. There are some things about poverty that most like to keep behind closed doors. Today, I am going to expose the true struggles of living in poverty.

The average income for the poverty line in America is $24,250 for a family of four. In 2015, 13.5% or 43.1 million Americans were found to be in poverty.* What this statistic doesn’t show is the amount of immense stress these 43.1 million American experience. Poverty leaves you in such distress, as if every day is a battle for your life. You wake up in the morning and the first thing on your mind is money. How will I pay for groceries? How many groceries can I get for $20? You know well that your two person household won’t be able to live off of that amount of groceries, but you don’t have a choice. You spend the rest of your day trying to get your mind off of your stress. You try everything from a nap to a nice, long run…but it doesn’t matter. Your stress returns almost immediately.

Along with stress comes the sleepless and restless nights. You lie awake and stare at your ceiling, hoping for the universe to send you a sign of what to do. Your anxiety increases with all of the hopeless “what ifs”. Soon it’s midnight and then 2:00 am and before you know it, you’re still wide awake come 5:00 am. You were supposed to go to a party the next day, but you can’t seem to pull yourself off of the couch since your anxiety, stress and depression have been hounding you into the wee hours of the morning. And so the cycle continues until you finally become exhausted.

You want to make plans to see your friends, but you’re too embarrassed to say, “I don’t have enough gas to get there”, or, “I don’t have money to go out to lunch.” Casual shopping trips and iced coffees with your girlfriends become a thing of the past, and something that you’re too easily envious of. You shop at Goodwill and feel guilty for spending a little extra cash on a few t-shirts and some jean shorts. Your pride shrinks and you begin to sink into a depression like state. You can’t take much wanted trips or vacations. You can hardly afford to go see your family in the next town over. You really begin to understand the true meaning of cabin fever.

You resort to prioritizing your bills and ultimately have to skip one or two a month just to afford food or gas for the week. The guilt is overwhelming when you’ve never missed a payment and you just got your credit in good standing. You almost feel like a failure even though you’re trying your very best to make things work day by day. You start to debate selling some of your expensive items just to have a little stash of extra money. Any money that you’re gifted is never spent recreationally, although that’s all you wish for is to be able to have expendable cash.

Your thoughts become overwhelming when you think about how worse it could be, and how easy you could end up homeless and on the streets. You want to be thankful for the things you have because you know others have it worse. You’re aware that there are different types of poverty and that the kind you live in is much better than others, but it’s still hard to focus on how good you have it when you feel so low. You prepare for the worst in every situation because although you’re hopeful, you’re never quite sure how it will end up. Your cynicism becomes increasingly high. You’re in constant fear of how fast things could go south.

Whilst living in poverty is stressful, difficult and outright overwhelming, surviving it comes with certain abilities. You learn how to problem solve. You learn that optimism can get you through more than you think. You learn just how strong willed you can be. You understand the meaning behind never giving up, mainly because you don’t have choice. When you want to be successful in life so bad, you will do just about anything to get there…even if you have to struggle for awhile first.

For all of those that can relate to this post and who might have it the same or, god forbid, worse than me, I want you to know that you can get through this. I am right here with you, and we can’t give up. Nothing ever lasts forever. Keep on keepin’ on.

Until next time, xo.

*Statistic according to talkpoverty.org.

[Photo Credit: Pixabay]