Why I Began Special Effects Makeup

Hello frenz! Welcome back! You might notice that things look a little different here on my blog, as well on my other social media accounts. I’ve recently started doing special effects makeup, and it turns out that I’m rather decent at it. I enjoy doing it so much that I’ve shied away from my blog for a little while. When I started blogging, I thought that I wanted to be this magnificent writer, but some thoughts have changed. Don’t get me wrong, I still LOVE to write…but I also LOVE doing makeup. But I’ve been thinking, why choose between two passions when I can do them both? So here it is, my new and improved blog…all about SFX makeup. For my readers who prefer my serious, article-type posts, I will still post those as a way to get my thoughts out, but the bulk of my content will be about SFX makeup. I’ve been told to create a YouTube channel for my looks, but I’m not too good with cameras, editing and talking. I’m better with written words and I only think it’s fair to give you all the best of my content.

First off, I want to say that I am in NO WAY a professional makeup artist. I do makeup for fun and all of the opinions expressed here on out are based off of my own experiences. If you’re looking for professional makeup advice, you’ve come to the wrong place, my dear. With that being said, I’ve been doing makeup since I was very young. It started with toy makeup as a baby nugget and progressed to spending all of my hard earned money at Sephora. I’ve been practicing my skills for some time now, and I’ve just now gotten to the point where I can say, with confidence, that I am good at makeup. Practice most certainly makes perfect, and with practice comes understanding. When you’ve played and practiced with makeup for so long, you begin to understand its use. It’s like an art — you begin to understand highlights and shadows and what colors flatter certain skin tones and eye colors. That’s when it starts to get fun.

I’ve always had a love for horror and gore. The first horror movie I ever watched was The Nightmare on Elm Street when I was really young. I was hooked after that. I enjoy the rush of being scared. I enjoy watching a bloody masterpiece in someone’s mind come to life. Call me weird, call me crazy, but it’s something I’ve always been fascinated with. I’ve always had an appreciation for art, too, but the problem with that is I’m not very artistic. I can’t draw for shit but I can color the shit out of a coloring book. Years ago, my sister introduced me to Glam and Gore on YouTube. I had found a new appreciation for special effects art. I would watch in awe as she created stunningly bloody looks, knowing that I would never be able to create it due to the lack of artistry in my veins. I became a bystander to the very thing I loved.

Thinking I could never do it made me never want to try. I thought I needed all of these products and a boatload of cash to be able to create these looks. But there was one day where I just said, fuck it, I’m gonna try. I broke out the eye shadow palettes and went to town. I was surprised with how natural it came to me. I’ve never been good at art, so how was I good at this? I found my new hobby and passion that day. Now fast forward three weeks — I’m shocked by my progression. Three weeks of practice has me creating looks that I never dreamed of being able to create. Not only have I impressed myself, but the public support has been overwhelming. I can’t figure out why I waited this long to do what I love, but I’m happy I started when I did.

I hope you enjoyed my little background story. If you’re interested in doing SFX, dramatic/glam, or even everyday makeup looks, my advice is to just do it. Try it and see what you’re able to create. Your undiscovered skills might shock you.

spooky

Liebster Award Nomination 2017 & My Nominees

Hello frenz and welcome back! This post is extra special and near & dear to my heart. I was nominated by the lovely RenaΒ for the Liebster Award! For those of you who aren’t familiar with what that is, it’s an award for bloggers. No trophy involved, just recognition and support for your blog. It’s a big deal for me, because I’ve literally never been nominated for anything. I once won a 3rd place Track and Field award in elementary school, but that’s about the extent of my award winning abilities. If you haven’t, go check out Rena’s blog. She’s a cat loving personal blogger who writes about some pretty relatable stuff – plus she’s super sweet, so give her blog a read. Now, without further adieu, let’s get into this thing!Β 

Rena’s questions to me are as follows, with my answers. I hope you enjoy getting to know a little more about me!

1. What is your go-to dressed up outfit? Every time you want to look done up, what do you tend to do?
Well, let’s address the outfit portion — I usually where anything that I feel comfortable and confident in. It really depends on my mood. Sometimes I want to wear a dress, and other times leggings and a cute top can suffice as “dressed up”. Don’t judge — comfortable can also be dressy. As for what I do to look done up, I definitely gotta fill in these sparse brows and add a sharp as shit winged liner.

2. What is the last book you read?
I’m one of those people that read half a book and then put it down and start another one. I’m currently in the middle of reading three different books, but the actual last one would be Salem Falls by Jodi Picoult. This book caught my eye on Walmart’s book shelf AGES ago, mainly because it had Salem in the name. I hardly remember what it’s about but I know I really enjoyed it. Perhaps I’ll make it the fourth book in my ongoing reading frenzy.

3. Why did you choose the blog platform you are on?
Mainly because I wanted a site where I was able to gain followers straight from the platform. Plus, I’ve heard very good things about WordPress. I honestly don’t think I’ll ever transfer platforms. WordPress is where it’s at for me.

4. What is one goal you have accomplished this year that you are really proud of?
Finding what I want to do in life. It’s not so much of a goal I had, but I’m really happy that I found my calling this year. I know I want to write for a living, and in learning that, it’s completely changed my outlook on the future.

5. What hair product would you rather not live without?
Leave-in conditioner. My hair has a nice, natural texture to it. I can live without styling it, but I definitely need it to be hydrated so it doesn’t turn into broom bristles.

6. What methods do you use to plan your blog posts?
I take mental notes most of the time. I get an idea and outline it in my head. If it’s a more complicated post that requires research and planning, I free write on my phone just to get my ideas out. Then I paste it as a draft in WordPress, get on my laptop and paste it into a Word document for edit. 90% of the time, I plan and upload posts from my iPhone.

7. What is one beauty trend you’re afraid to try but really want to?
Bright colored hair. I once dyed my platinum blonde hair a non-permanent blue and it stained my hair. I spent countless nights bleaching my hair to get it out, leaving it dry and lifeless. I love the look of ombre’d colored hair and I would kill to have it, but I’m way too apprehensive due to a bad experience.

8. Do you prefer sweet or salty snacks?
It ultimately depends on my mood. Sometimes I have a hankering for chocolate that can only be satisfied by eating four bags of M&Ms. And then other times, I can eat 12 bags of potato chips like it’s nothing. I honestly don’t snack too often, but the type of snack I want is usually reliant on my mood.

9. What is one song you can’t stop listening to at the moment?
I don’t have one specific song as I do one specific artist. I went full 2006 emo kid and listened to My Chemical Romance for a month. Now I’m on a Melanie Martinez kick. I give it a few days until I’m jamming to Cannibal Corpse for weeks.

10. Do you have a favorite magazine and why?
I might be in my 20s, but I’m still a huge fan of Seventeen magazine. They have a lot of nice tips and trends — plus they always have vibrant colors which usually catch my eye. Their articles/stories are also very well written and their magazine is nicely put together.

11. What is one piece of advice you would give a first-time blogger?
Just do it. You might feel silly or like a noob, but the blogging community is extremely supportive of all types of blogs. I thought since I didn’t write about makeup or beauty that there wasn’t going to be a place for me in the blogging world, but the reactions to my posts are just the opposite. I have tons of blogger friends. I honestly have more online friends than I do in real life. Blogging is a commitment, but if you’re truly passionate about it, you will love every second of it. Just put yourself out there and go for it.

Now that you learned a little about me, it’s time for my nominations! Since Rena nominated me, I’ve been constantly thinking of who I want to nominate. There’s this rule about only nominating blogs with “200 followers or less”, but I feel weird about asking someone or creeping on their blog. So I’m going to nominate some of my favorite bloggers that really need some love and recognition.

Mystic Mogwai – I found this girl on Twitter and she’s so incredible. I love her style and her blog name is ingenious. She’s not one specific type of blogger, which is why I love her blog so much. She’s chatty and her blogs are fun to read!

Natural Hazards and MoreΒ – This girl deserves so much recognition for her ongoing battle of informing the internet world on science. Her blogs are extremely important to the future of the planet.

Ditzy D Blog Β – She writes about her self journey through anxiety and depression in such a beautifully honest way. Her blog deserves so much recognition.

The Emma LifestyleΒ – She’s a lifestyle blogger who writes about everything — from beauty products to book reviews to everyday life. She’s a sweetheart and I really enjoy her blog.

Howling LibrariesΒ – I really love book bloggers. Although I’m not currently too much of a reader, I enjoy reading book reviews. She writes really solid reviews, so why not go give her blog a read?

Black Tulip BeautyΒ – And last, but certainly not least, is one of my FAVORITE beauty bloggers out there — mainly because she’s a total babe and I wish I could jack her style. She writes incredible product reviews and also has sunflower yellow hair!? She’s the total package when it comes to beauty bloggers.

Below are the questions for my nominees, if you choose to accept! Have fun!

1. If you could be any animal, which would you be? Why?

2. What is your holy grail beauty product and why?

3. What is the one thing you want most out of life?

4. How do you come up with ideas for blog posts?

5. Who is your biggest role model? Why?

6. If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?

7. What is your dream job?

8. Do you think you would survive in a zombie apocalypse? Why or why not?

9. What are you most confident about?

10. What’s your favorite movie and why?

Goals for the Rest of 2017

Hello frenz! Welcome back to whatever this blog has come to. I've been bored with my blog lately, so I thought about doing something a little different. I've seen these done before and I think it's fabulous to share goals with likeminded individuals. I've tried to keep this post upbeat, but to be honest, I haven't been so positive lately. So here goes – my goal list for the rest of 2017.

GET A JOB
I've been unemployed since March, so that makes a total of almost five months now. I was planning to join the Air Force, but realized that I was leaving too much behind (also I'm too old to be tricked by military schemes). I put that goal behind me and now I have another – to find a job. Not only do I need one to pay my bills and buy food, but I'm tired of not working. Every day since losing my job has turned into a blur and I'm ready to be productive again.

SAVE MONEY
I really don't want to live in Pennsylvania anymore. It's poor and highly taxed. The weather sucks and my town should be known as Drug and Crime Central. By getting a decent (and steady) paycheck from accomplishing Goal #1, I hope to be able to start saving enough money to get the hell out of here within the next two years.

GAIN A FOLLOWING
I want to write for a living, I've known that for some time now. I want to be a full time writer or even a full time blogger at some point. I want to get my blog out there and create a name for myself. I need to start creating my empire.

LIVE STRESS FREE
I don't think I've ever had this amount of stress in my life. I have nervous breakdowns almost every day, mostly due to lack of money. I can't afford things I want and need. I want to live stress free again. I want to be able to enjoy life and wake up happy.

BEGIN SFX MAKEUP
This is something I've wanted to do for some time, but haven't had the money or want to invest the time in. But Halloween is coming up and you best believe I want to scare all the kiddos on the block this year.

MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LIFE
Since money has been so tight recently, I've only been eating once a day and skipping the gym to conserve gas. I need to get back into the routine of working out regularly and eating enough so I don't waste away into nothing. It's easier said than done when you have $-33 to your name.

TAKE ANOTHER TRIP TO FL
My trip to Florida at the beginning of July was so incredible. Seeing and spending time with my family meant so much to me. I want to make it into a regular visit.

READ MORE
I really do enjoy reading, but I lack the interest to do anything other than nap (thanks depression). I also find myself reading the words but daydreaming about something else, which leads me to reading the same paragraph ten times. I have so many books but have only read maybe five of them. I'd like to read them all and then add to my collection.

BUY MORE MAKEUP PRODUCTS
It sounds a little materialistic but I'm a sucker when it comes to makeup. I watch and read tons of reviews on new products and I want them all…but lack the dough to get them. I haven't purchased any new makeup in at least a year, and it's breaking my heart.

GIVE GIFTS AT CHRISTMAS
Last Christmas was horrible. I wasn't able to get anything for anyone and it made me feel so low. Christmas is my second favorite holiday and I love giving to others. I want to be able to give to everyone I can this year, and even to the less fortunate. I miss having the means to be generous.

BE GENUINELY HAPPY
I haven't been happy in such a long time, and I really miss the feeling of enjoying life. I need to get that feeling back for my own sanity.

I'm keeping this list as my own little time capsule of things I want to accomplish. I hope to look back in January 2018 to have accomplished all of these and then some. Here's to my future endeavors.

Florida Nights: My First Time Traveling

florida

Hello, frenz! Long time no blog! It’s been a few days since I’ve arrived back to Almost 70 Degrees and Overcast, Pennsylvania. It’s always a bittersweet feeling to arrive home after a one-week vacation; you wish you could’ve stayed longer but, at the same time, you miss your boo and fur babies. Florida was an incredible experience. It was my first time being on an airplane (which caused a nervous breakdown all its own). It was my first ever vacation in another state and even away from home – other than the time I was 13 and went to Las Vegas, but that honestly shouldn’t even count. It was an incredible experience, even through the most frustrating of times. Let’s sort these out in categories, shall we?

THE INITIAL AIRPORT EXPERIENCE
I get really bad anxiety when I have to be somewhere at a certain time so you best believe I was planning out the trip to the airport and every little move I would make. I (obviously) psyched myself out because it wasn’t a terrible experience…at all. Granted the airport we flew out of was incredibly small, so it was easy to find the kiosks, security and the terminal. I even got fresh airport coffee, which I was looking forward to since we left at 3:30 in the morning. The more time that passed, the more nervous I became that there would be an issue with our bags or somehow the flight would be cancelled (hello irrational fear). As zones were called and I began boarding my very first aircraft, the nervous feelings subsided, as I had successfully navigated through my first airport. That’s a win for this girl!

THE FLIGHT TO ORLANDO, FL
Okay, so I had a minor freak out within my own head when the plane took off — mainly because it shot back like a rocket and I was glued to the back of my seat. To be honest, I’m not sure what I was expecting other than the plane to blow up Final Destination style. Once we were at altitude, my nerves relaxed — until I had to pee. That was an experience all its own. First, I tried to open a closed stall (are they called stalls?) because I didn’t look around to see that there were, in fact, two potties in the same vicinity. I also couldn’t figure out how to get the water on to wash my hands, and soon couldn’t figure out how to turn it off. I wasn’t the whitest cloud in the sky that morning.

ARRIVAL IN ORLANDO INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT
Arriving into sunny Orlando, Florida was incredible. Even looking down from the plane, it’s so clear how beautiful the Sunshine State is. The Orlando airport is international so it was massive in comparison to the one at home, in landmass and population. There was so much diversity in people, where they came from and where they were going. I was a confused mess when I finally had my feet on the ground — I didn’t know where to go or how to navigate this large and in-charge airport. Talk about a culture shock. Thankfully, everyone in Florida (unlike PA) are incredibly kind and helped us find the shuttle that would take us downstairs. From there, we were on our own to take elevators to ground transportation, which is where we thought we needed to be. It took us a good 20 minutes to figure out how to get outside. It turns out, my brother-in-law was at a different part of the airport looking for us. And so the shenanigans ensued.

Odd Fact: the buttons designating floor numbers in the elevators are labeled as cattle in the Orlando airport. Why?

ORLANDO, FL
So we didn’t actually stay in Orlando itself. My family lives about 20 minutes out of Orlando, and that’s where we spent the majority of our time. When we arrived, I was taken back by how hot it was. Now don’t get me wrong, I didn’t think it was going to be like it is up North, but I wasn’t expecting to be a baked potato as soon as I stepped out the door. The heat was incredible. You couldn’t get in a car without your legs and back burning on the seats. You couldn’t lay out in the sun to get a tan without becoming a sweaty pile of goo. Needless to say, I spent the majority of my time in the pool.

We weren’t pool potatoes for long before we became beach potatoes. I, personally, have only seen the ocean on TV. I was taken back by how huge (and how hot) it actually was. Crystal blue water with white (hot!) sand — it wasn’t long until I grabbed the boogie board and attempted to catch some waves. The waves knocked me down more times than I could count…I obviously didn’t have my sea legs. I could’ve spent my entire life in the ocean. We collected seashells and I learned about crab and clam holes from a 10 year old. It was a magnificent way to spend the day…except for the sunburn. That could’ve stayed on the shore.

Since daytime is so hot in Florida, we decided to wait until evening on one Sunday to go play miniature golf, and after, laser tag. The golf course was a tropical pirate theme with two separate courses. The plant life and scenery was the epitome of a tropical vacation…and let’s talk about the amount of lizards! I so badly wanted to catch a baby lizard, but those suckers are fast! While the humidity was at an all time high (but it made my hair look good so whatevz), it was a breath of fresh air (literal air conditioning) when we went to WonderWorks to play laser tag. Yet another first checked off of my list, but I have to say, I wasn’t a fan, mostly because I sucked and my shirt kept falling down. First World Problems, I know.

The remaining days spent in Florida were poolside with bagels and coffee — also a three hour nap in the pool (hello crispy legs). The sun was relaxing and therapeutic to me — I wasn’t thinking of all the problems I had at home. I was living right in the moment without a care in the world. But, all good things eventually come to a screeching halt.

THE FINAL AIRPORT EXPERIENCE
Getting to the Orlando airport was a fucking nightmare. The rush hour traffic was at an all time high, with cars dodging other cars left and right. All I wanted to do was get to the airport and get on my plane because my anxiety was making me a flustered mess. The parking garage that my brother-in-law wanted to park in was full, so we spent a good 15 minutes driving around looking for a spot — meanwhile, I was having a panic attack about somehow missing my flight. We made it there at 6:00 and our ticket said we had to be through security by 6:27; I still wanted coffee and my sister needed to visit a gift shop — do you see why I was a hot mess? I later found out that we had more time than anticipated and I was a happy clam when I finally got my coffee…except when I threw it out in the security line because I wasn’t sure if I would be able to have it. RIP to my half full iced coffee. I still miss you.

HOME SWEET HOME!
It’s a weird feeling when you come back from vacation. It’s like you just lived this completely different life and then you’re back to where you started a week prior. Although I wish I could’ve stayed in Florida forever, I was ready to be home. It’s been five days since I’ve been home and I’m just now able to get my routine back. My days in Florida are becoming a fond memory.

All in all, it was a great experience. I don’t know if I would travel the world or be one of those “full-time travelers” after this experience. It’s too much of a pain in the ass to navigate airports and dodge that amount of people — it’s not my thing. It’s nice to have that place that’s “home” and I’m as happy as a clam to be back. I’m trying to get my blog and life back in order, so hang in there with me.

rl

The Importance of Wearing Sunscreen

sunscreen.png

‘Tis the season for bikinis, days at the beach and the inevitable and always dreadful sunburn. Every year, the same thing. You go out into the sun for a day (or a few hours), forget to apply a sunscreen and by the end of the day, you look and feel like a burnt piece of plastic. The days to come until the burn subsides are grueling and you can’t help but hate yourself for not taking the time to apply sunscreen. When I was a kid, I didn’t care about sunscreen. I never burned and I always had a fabulous tan. But now, about ten years later, it’s like my skin did a complete 180. I no longer tan; I only burn. I think to myself while being in the sun that I want a tan and that sunscreen would prevent me from getting one — so I never used it. It took me 23 years, but I have finally understood the reason for sunscreen and why we all should be using it.

Skin is the largest organ on the body, coming in at a whopping 16% of a our total body weight. It covers your blood vessels, nerves and organs, as well as protecting your body against dangerous bacteria. We all know the basic ways to have healthy skin — keep it clean, hydrated and protected from the sun. But exactly why do we have to protect it from the sun? When your skin is exposed to the sun, it creates melanin — a chemical produced from your skin to naturally protect it from harmful UV radiation from the sun. There are two types of ultraviolet radiation — UVA and UVB. While both are harmful, UVB rays are the worst for your skin to be exposed to. Sunburns occur when your skin is exposed to more UV rays than the level of melanin your skin produces. The lighter your complexion, the less melanin your skin will produce and it’s more likely for you to burn. Darker complexions can be effected by harmful UV rays, too. Darker complexions have a higher level of melanin in the skin, which acts as a natural protectant to UV rays and is what causes the skin to be darker. While this may protect against sunburns, it doesn’t necessarily protect against benign tumors or skin cancer.

Too much sun exposure on your skin can damage it irreversibly. Ultraviolet rays damage a tissue in our skin known as elastin, which, you guessed it, keeps our skin elastic. When that tissue is damaged repeatedly over time, it can cause the skin to lose elasticity and become leathery. Your skin can begin to bruise easily and even become deteriorated. Although the effects of sun exposure won’t be apparent while you’re young, it can become very noticeable later in life. This is why sunscreen is so important to lifelong healthy skin.

Sunscreen contains ingredients that block the ultraviolet radiation from reaching your skin. The higher the SPF, or Sun Protection Factor, contained in the sunscreen, the more percentage of UV rays are blocked. There can be damage to the skin without the occurrence of a sunburn, which is why it is better to use a sunscreen that has broad spectrum ingredients, which protect from both UVA and UVB rays. Although higher SPFs offer more protection, no sunscreen should be expected to exceed a two hour wear without reapplication. If you’re spending a day at the beach, pool or you work outdoors, be sure to use a water-resistant broad spectrum sunscreen that will stay on your skin — and be sure to reapply generously. There are tons of low SPF moisturizers available for every day wear, as well.

There are some common myths out there about sunscreen, like you should only wear it when the sun is out or that it won’t allow your skin to tan. These are false. Did you know that 40% of the sun’s ultraviolet rays reach Earth on very cloudy days? Your skin can still be damaged even if it’s not in direct exposure with the sun. You can actually get a little color on some of the cloudiest of days! This leads me right into my next myth bust, you can become tan using sunscreen. The SPF in sunscreen only protects your skin from burning, not tanning. For example, a sunscreen with SPF 15 means that if you begin to burn after ten minutes, it will provide you with 150 minutes of protection. It is possible to protect your skin and get that beautiful sun kissed tan!

If you don’t want to bake your skin in the sun just for a bronzed look, you can always try alternative tanning. There are various types of fake tans, like lotions, spray tans and the self tans that you can do in the comfort of your own bathroom. One of my personal favorites is the Malibu Tan Hemp Golden Glow Skin Firming Bronzing Moisturizer.

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You can purchase it at Walmart or Sally’s Beauty Supply Store and it’ll run you anything from $6-$23, depending on the size you want to purchase. The formula of it is extremely moisturizing and it smells like a tropical vacation. It’s also cruelty-free! It takes about a week to build up a nice base, but if used consistently, you will have a noticeable and beautiful tan. It will make little crevasses, like your cuticles and between your fingers/toes a little orange, so be sure to wash your hands and feet after applying, unless your goal was to be Oompa Loompa orange — in that case, rock it, sister.

In this heat, it’s almost impossible to resist spending the day out and about. Whether you’re going shopping, spending the day by the pool or working outdoors, remember that your skin needs some extra protection. Spend that extra ten minutes applying sunscreen. Future you will appreciate it. Be safe. Drink your water and stay cool.

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Sources: webmd.com, howthingswork.org, medlineplus.org

[Photo Credit: Pixabay]

Letting Go of Toxic Thoughts

toxic thoughts

We all have toxic or negative thoughts, whether it’s about ourselves, other people or something we don’t fancy doing. Sometimes these thoughts can overpower all of the positive ones, and as a result we’re left feeling mentally and emotionally drained. But how do we stop seeing the negative and start noticing the positive side to life? That’s where mind control comes in. No, not the type that David Blaine does on Las Vegas sidewalks; I’m talking about controlling our own minds to turn toxic thoughts into positive thoughts.

Sometimes I get overwhelming thoughts about myself. My mind makes me feel that I’m not good at anything and sometimes, it even goes as far as making me feel that the world would be better off without me. I’m a generally optimistic person, I just have a few issues with anxiety…so why do I feel this way? Negative or toxic thinking usually begins with a mistake I’ve made that I feel overly embarrassed for, and then it turns into thinking about everything I’ve ever done wrong. If you think like this too, there is a way to control it. You simply talk yourself out of it. It sounds crazy, I know, but it’s really that simple. Let yourself make a mistake. Acknowledge said mistake, learn how to do better next time, and move on. Don’t beat yourself up for it. You’re human. This is how you grow and become better. This is especially true if you’re a toxic thinker in relationships. Talk to your significant other about it. Sometimes their reassurance is all you need to convince yourself that it’s okay to be human. This goes hand in hand with perfectionism, which is a main player in my toxic thoughts.

“I want so bad to be perfect although I know perfect does not exist.”

Turning toxic thoughts into positive thoughts can be grueling when you’re not naturally an optimistic person, but sometimes that’s all it takes to turn your day around. It’s an old saying, but try to look on the bright side. Yeah, things might be hard at work or you’re having a crap day, but there’s always a positive. Spilled your coffee in your car? There’s a reason to buy that Starbucks coffee that you never get to have, and a reason to stop the procrastination of cleaning your car. Is your boss on your case really hard today? Remember that all days come to an end. It’s so easy to jump to toxic thinking when something bad happens. It’s easy to think that one disaster can ruin your whole day; but it can get better when you deal with a problem when it happens, and then move on. Deal with your emotions in the moment rather than letting them boil all day until the inevitable eruption.

Stop taking everything so personally. This is something I’ve struggled with and I am just now learning how to handle. I’m a people pleaser, especially when it comes to a loved one. If my boyfriend wakes up grumpy, I automatically assume it’s because of me. When he loses his temper at a video game, I get nervous because I don’t want him upset or mad at me. I’m familiar with the fact that it has nothing to do with me, but my toxic thoughts lead me to think that I did something wrong. If you’re like this too, stop it. Stop it right now. Not everything is a personal attack at you. Learn to understand the difference between a person who is grumpy at the world and a person who is grumpy at you. Walk away or ignore this behavior in your loved one to save yourself time and energy.

Sometimes we do have bad days where everything is happening all at once and we can’t help but become overwhelmed and frustrated. I’m not denying that days like this exist. I’m also not denying that anxiety and toxic thinking feed off of each other. What I do know is that you can talk yourself out of any emotion as long as you acknowledge it, deal with it and move forward. Your mind likes to play a lot of tricks on you. Start playing tricks back.

Until next time, XO.

[Photo Credit: Pixabay]

Gaining Confidence in Today’s World

confidence

Let’s face it, we’re all self conscious about something. Whether you think your nose is too big for your face or you got that belly with some love handles, we all have something we wish we could change. And if we can’t change it, we try our damnedest to cover it at all costs. But ladies, why do we do this? If we can’t love our bodies enough to show it off, then who will? Let’s talk about confidence.

Confidence is a hard thing to have in today’s world. With thousands of beautiful women surrounding us on social media and television, it’s difficult to look at these beautiful women day in and day out and not wish you looked like them. But have no fear, I’m here to tell you that you — yes, you, are just as beautiful. I know, I know, you hear and see this phrase everywhere since the much needed Body Positivity Movement, as I like to call it. Gaining confidence has become a bit of a cliche, but it’s something we all need to feel good in our daily lives.

This post may be reeking of body positivity, but that’s not what I’m here to preach. Yes, you should love your body no matter your size, but you should also love your body enough to take care of it properly. You should be exercising regularly, not to lose weight but to clear your mind and get those endorphins pumping — and sure, losing weight or gaining muscle tone along with it wouldn’t be a terrible thing. You should love your body enough to not poison it with processed foods, sugars, alcohol, etc… You should practice good and healthy skin care. All of these things can help you feel confident, because they make you feel (and look) good. When you treat your body with respect and nourish it from the inside, it will shine right on through to the outside. When you look good, you feel good; right?

Now enough with my preaching about a healthy life — if you want to feel confident, you need to act like the boss ass bitch that you are. Don’t think about your flaws, flaunt them. Wear that crop top even though you have that belly. If someone else doesn’t like it, well they can simply not look. Stop basing your life on what other people may or may not be thinking about you because chances are, they didn’t even notice that your belly hangs a little bit over your shorts or that your teeth are a little wonky. Believe me, I know it’s hard to wear that bikini in fear of being judged, but what is someone going to say to you that you haven’t already told yourself? Own your body. Rock those hips or lack thereof. Love and respect your body the way it is right now.

You are a beautiful creature of Earth, it’s time you realize that.

So we talked about how to feel good with our bodies, but what about our personalities? Sometimes we have personality traits that we just can’t stand. For example, I talk really fast and stumble over my words 95% of the time that I speak. It makes me feel stupid, uneducated and like no one ever wants to conversate with me, but, in all honesty, that’s how I make myself feel. Most of the time no one even notices (or they’re polite enough not to point it out), or instead, I notice them fumble their words. You have to remember that everyone has something they don’t like about themselves, whether they talk about it or not. They’re not things we can help, so we need to learn to accept ourselves the way we are. If we don’t accept ourselves for who we are, who else will?

Confidence isn’t about getting to a certain point and saying, “this is good enough.”Β  You should never settle for good enough. You should always be looking for ways to improve to become the best version of yourself. Become more outgoing and ask that cute guy at the coffee shop out for a drink. Do things you’ve never dreamed of doing — accomplishing goals or overcoming fears makes you feel phenomenal and can boost your self confidence right into outer space.

If you’re trying to gain confidence and become more comfortable with yourself, the only true way is self love and acceptance. You are who you are. We, as women and a society, need to recognize our worth. You are special. You are worth it. And if it makes you feel better, remember that those models and actresses on the internet and television struggle with something they don’t like about themselves, too. They’re just a little better at hiding it.

Until next time, xo.

[Photo Credit: Pixabay]